Letters to Happyclown

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Nomination Hall

"Eleanor Helen Fish - efish@acesshealth.com

Chief ingredients of this one's receipe are integrity/Character/agape love multicultural/missionary minded and HIGH SPIRITUAL values for man kind of all ages/has a great dream and vision for wellness and happiness starting with the kid inside and the larger maturing kid outside/world wide wellness on wheels is the theme with the F.I.S.H. goal and vision through clowning and spreading infectious happiness starting down at the roots /breaking through to the heavens."

url: none available at this time/one can be furnished when considered!

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"Tony Blair

He left Planet Colgate to come to save our planet. He stopped breathing his local planetary air and has been severely affected by the small quantity of Helium found on Earths atmosphere which makes him squeak. His wifes mouth expanded into a sardonical grimace and he is only able to befriend the rich. Nevertheless he still smiles, God bless him and God bless us one and all."

url: labour party hq - I couldn't download it - he is too magnificent for a mewre mortal like we to gaze upon his radiance....

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"Pres. Robert Corrigan

Through a stragetic partnership with the philanthropic Bilderburg institure he is ensuring a high standard of quality education at San Francisco State University. Using their new, patented, BilderLearn teaching methods and curriculum, and the addition of several highly trained new staff - we here at SFSU are learning more about the world of tomorrow than we ever thought possible before! And we have Pres. Robert Corrigan and the philanthropic Bilderburg group to thank for it!"

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"Sergeant Zeno

Zeno is a person of great power and importance -- he works for the Army Chief of Staff at the Pentagon.

Zeno has dedicated his or her life to happily helping the denizens of our great and wondrous Global Society . He is out there making our world a great place!

He is committed to putting the best interests of the Global Society ahead of everything!

Zeno has an awesome smile and some striking green eyes!!!"

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"Ms .45

Checked this out, and I'm still trying to work out - what the fuck was going through this dude's mind when he posted this? Is this a joke? I mean, it is, but is it a joke along the lines of "Send a card to this dying boy in Buttfuck Arkansas" or is this person really a clueless lamer who thinks that the denizens of a.t. won't fall over themselves to nominate Sergeant Zeno as Happyclown of the Month??!!!!!"

url: http://minyos.its.rmit.EDU.AU/~bkerr/
email: Ms .45 <bkerr@minyos.its.rmit.EDU.AU>

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"The Andromeda Strain

Maj. Ed Dames (ex-CIA remote viewer) brought to our attention that an alien species would happily bring succor to the planet by unleashing an "engineered plant pathogen" to rid the world of all those jungley green plants and a few billion excess people. The world will indeed be a much better place for the 15% who survive. Thanks to Maj. Dames and to the aliens for planning to rid the earth of the cancer of human population."

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"Stephen Marshall

Why do you think? I mean he's a born clown! He's your man, the leader of the conspiracy."

url: http://www.channel-zero.com

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"Pope John Paul II

He's a world humanitarian, and he already has a funney hat."

url: http://www.vatican.va

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"Claire Luna

She's nucking futs. Plus she has this fetish about four boys performing a circle jerk for her in the middle of the night. (We said no) She also squeeks a hell of a lot, and that bothers me. I guess that's it. Sorry, no picture."

Claire Luna Nomination Marathon
  WARNING!   For Adults ONLY!

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"Simon Berman

Because he is really a very happy clown and it would make his heart sing with glee. Or at least mine anyway. No pictures of him on the web, but I can provide you with one."

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Concerned Citizens

Missing Game Piece

"To whom it may concern,

I am not sure this is the right place to send a minor complaint but I will try anyway. I just returned from running errands and had stopped through a drive-thru on my way home. Because I saw the sign about your build a Big Mac game I chose to order a Big Mac instead of my usual cheeseburger and a large Diet Coke so that I would get two game pieces. After pulling out and driving about 1/2 mile away I reached into the bag for my Big Mac and imagine my disappointment when I found that there was no game piece on the box! This McDonald's must be using older boxes. I was not told that they were out of game pieces or anything like that. I did not have time to backtrack and ask for a game piece.

I just wanted to get this off my chest since I bothered me the whole way home. I may be extra sensitive since I am 10 days overdue with our second child. I just felt that I was mislead.

Respectfully submitted,"

from: Anne Cowher email: cowher@ptd.net

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"I got a real kick out of Happyclown.com, particularly the GE Electric Oxygen Tree Tree. I used to work for GE - an experience more surreal than even you could imagine. The GE Tree is not too far off from reality. GE is one of the world's best suppliers of pollution - for instance, it is currently involved in bickering with the state of Massachusetts over cleaning up the crud it pumped into the Housatonic River for many years. Meanwhile, according to the GE web site, the company recently introduced its first new line of major home appliances in decades: a tap water purification system. Having it both ways in the NWO."

email: mdougher@emerald.tufts.edu

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The Humble Report

A recent report is saying that artificial flavouring in food may actually be good for you. McDonalds is just having a field day with this and have already come up with several new slogans like:

"We've always used artificial stuff in everything" and

"MMM MMMM we'll just bet you'd like to know what that thing that tastes like a hamburger really is?"

url: http://edge.passport.ca/inside/humfred/humblereport/
email: <humfred@passport.ca>

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"Dear BigNose:

I loved your site, but don't you think that . . . in view of all the GOOD news there is in the world today . . . you could be a little . . . happier? You seem a bit down in the dumps."

from: Bob Zilla
email: <bobzilla@netbox.com>

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"Hello - can you please tell me who wrote the "have you had your break today", Jingle?

Many many thanks - Shana Priwer"

email: <gsd94sp2@venus.gsd.havard.edu>

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Global Neighbourhood

You've made me happy. Perhaps I'll see you at thge corner of Bay and Bloor.

from: Rick Sacks - proprietor of Rik's Cafe Canadian
url: http://www.vex.net/rikscafe/
email: rixax@vex.net

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"Dear purveyors of a new world order:

Congratulations! With the happyclown contingent and Project Bluebeam a reality, I can now rest assured of entering a new universe of peace, calm and unbridled opportunity!

There is surely no doubt that our world leaders, those thoughtful mandarins with their unlimited compassion for the world's masses and the future of mankind, are even now paving the way for the Utopian future that has always, is, and will continue to be Humankind's birthright!

Bravo, and vive la status quo!

Yours mirthfully, Rufus T. Firefly"

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"I am soo happy to see that you have grasped and are promoting the spirit of global goodwill that our benificient leaders (who would never stoop so low as to monitor our email or tap our phones) are eminating.

I for one am looking forward to the day when I can devour my first Bilder Burger.

Keep up the great work!"

from: Steven A. Reid, M.D.
url: http://www.mindspring.com/~sreid/
email: <sreid@gainv.mindspring.com>

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"You guys are brilliant.

Your pages are beautiful, and I am totally impressed with the way you have contrived to get people to stick around long enough to find the NWO message.


I pray that we end up in the same detention center, there to join together in defeating our captors through ridicule."

from: Todd W. Gillespie
email: <tgillesp@gate.net>

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"say...you boys aren't from around here, are yew?"

from: unknown

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"Bravo! You guys are tha madd clever, phat-ass culture jammers. Your page rocks, not only in technical sophistication but raw talent as well. You're a breath of fresh air in this media world of self-righteous, Sarandonesque, one-issue whiners."

If I come up with any nominations you'll be the first to know.

Peace out,

from: Johan Hammerstrom
email: <jstrom@linus.che.jhu.edu>

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"Sind sie auf Deutschland?"

from: Red Baron (Mike)
email: <redb@fia.net>

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